The Anger Of Infertility
I have a lot of anger, lately. Rightfully so, I feel. Infertility has taken much from us - infertility has replaced our dreams and hopes with anger, fear, and sadness.
I’m angry that insurance and money play such big roles in our choices.
I’m angry that people keep asking “when are you guys having children?” and “Two years of marriage, eh? Time to have a baby!” I’m angry that people think this is any of their business, that my lady parts seem to be an acceptable topic of conversation.
I’m angry that I overhear people saying, “we’ll have a baby a year or so after we get married” and my first thought is, “don’t be so sure about that.”
I’m angry that my husband’s infertility leaves him with nearly no desire for me. It has taken away my sex life.
I’m angry that when I put enough trust in someone to tell them what’s going on, I hear, “just do IVF,” “you need to just adopt, “ or “stop trying, you’ll get knocked up for sure!” Everyone thinks they have the solution when they don’t even really understand the problem.
Source: bandbacktogether.com
Things That Are Bullshit: Faking It
One of the problems with living in a land where there is also porn is the incidental pornification of regular old normal-people-with-all-their-original-parts sex. This is regardless of your feminist/moral/ethical/fencing stance towards porn itself. It infiltrates your bedroom habits even if you don’t watch (or read) porn, visit risque tumblrs, or squint through the fuzzy static lines at Skinemax at your aunt’s house when you’re 15, first discovering masturbation.
Let me start from the beginning.
I was a pretty sheltered kid – had only seen a handful of parental-selected R-rated moves when I turned 17. I didn’t have a relationship serious enough to even THINK of having sex until I was about to graduate high school. Eventually my parts found my way to my then-boyfriend’s parts; and sexy time sensations being what they, are I soon discovered that I was what the kids these days call “really freaking loud.”
Part of that was natural: I have a big voice, I’m a singer and a swimmer, so I have big lungs, I have a big loud laugh…my sexy times sounds are not going to be dainty or confused with a cooing dove any time soon (and that’s okay). That first relationship was all about two virgins figuring out where what goes, and what to do with it when it gets there, and I feel lucky that my first experiences were so accepting and mutual and good.
Source: bandbacktogether.com
